Infidelity.

So I want to start this post by saying two things.

1. I am extremely not proud of my behavior over the next six months of this story.

2. I am changing his name from TBTS to J. It makes it easier.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

So it happened. We kissed. For the entire world to see. Sober. I had no excuse.

We went upstairs to his apartment and tip-toed into his room. I knew it was a bad idea. I was friends with J's roommates and they surely knew I had a boyfriend. But... I just "had to see the Thomas Crown affiar - how had I not?"

I was repulsed by his room. It was the epitome of everything bad bachelor. Zebra print sheets and a leopard print comforter. True story. And this was a guy the girls went crazy over? (And trust me, they did). I told myself I could never sleep with a boy who slept in a veritable animal kingdom.

I stayed there that night and nothing happened more than a few kisses, but the chemistry was intense. I hid in the morning when I heard his roommates shuffling around and when I finally snuck out, I swore to myself it would never happen again. I had a boyfriend.

As you can imagine, it happened again. Several times. And I couldn't deny that more was happening over the next few months. We would meet on the quad on sunny days between classes to hang out. He became my absolute favorite study companion even though his major was the exact opposite of mine (accounting v. psychology). He would tease me about my boyfriend and I would pretend to ignore the jealousy I felt when I saw other girls around him.

I tried to hide it from my friends. But, as fate always has it, I was busted. In a public way. My best girlfriends and I were walking back to our apartments one day after happy hour and J and his buddies were sitting on the front porch steps of their fraternity's senior house. We made eye contact. I wish I could tell you what happened then. I remember snapping out of it when one of J's and I's very good mutual friends came running up to hug me. I think when he made contact my eyes were those that were caught in headlights, just staring at J. I just knew everyone around could hear my heart beating. He called out hello, as all of my girlfriends were friends with J, and I muttered something about needing to leave right then.

My best friend B by my side, I was busted. "Who was that?" Silence. "Wow, that's him, huh?". "That obvious?". "Let's just say we can all tell he loves you".

J and I slept together for the first time the next week.